


a last goodbye

by arthursmorgan



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Confessions, First Kiss, Grief/Mourning, Last Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-02-03
Packaged: 2019-10-21 19:49:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17648792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arthursmorgan/pseuds/arthursmorgan
Summary: And Charles would always go with Arthur, would ride with him into the most deadly battles, would always be by his side until his own breathing ceased; and so he would also be there, right at Arthurs side, holding him and comforting him, as he died.





	a last goodbye

Charles pushed Taima, as much so that he wondered why she hadn‘t bucked him off already. But somehow, within the panting and heaving, he heard panic. And he felt as though Taima knew exactly where they were going and why, and as though she wanted to be there just as quickly and desperately as Charles did. He rode for minutes, and even without pushing Taima further, he noticed her pace accelerating as they neared the location John had directed him to.

He had met John whilst he was escaping, running to reunite with his family to protect them. He had been frantic, sweat running down his forehead and his eyes bloodshot, his clothes were red and brown and wet from all the blood and dirt he was subjected to. He told Charles about what happened, his voice panicked and even hoarser than usual, and Charles didn‘t take another breath before he mounted Taima and told her to sprint. Sprint as though his life depended on it because, in some ways, it did. 

When he saw Micah running away like the coward he had always been and still was, Charles knew he was getting closer. And he ran up the steep hill from which Micah had escaped from until he reached the crevice in the mountain top. 

Then he saw him, lying there, panting and exhausted, and Charles ran towards him and fell onto his knees next to him, grabbing onto him, whatever he could - he didn‘t care - just to feel him. Just to feel the still beating heart and the breathing chest.

Arthur turned his face slowly towards him. He looked horrible, yet his eyes were peaceful. Peaceful in a way Charles had never seen him before, in a way he could not comprehend quite yet. The peaceful feeling of knowing that soon, it would all be over; soon he would be set free.

And Charles would always go with Arthur, would ride with him into the most deadly battles, would always be by his side until his own breathing ceased; and so he would also be there, right at Arthurs side, holding him and comforting him, as he died.

„Charles,“ Arthur gasped quietly, reaching up with his hand to cover one of Charles‘ that were gripping tightly onto his stubbled face and his hollowed cheeks.

Arthur took a deep breath, wheezing while doing so, his lungs burning in his chest; and closed his eyes. Charles could hear his own heart pounding in his ears and a panic started to rise inside of him, twisting and pulling at his insides, tearing him to shreds. Then Arthur opened his eyes again, cloudy blue meeting frightened brown, and Charles exhaled.

„Charles, I never told you,“ he panted in between pauses. Pauses to collect himself, to let the words he was about to say seep in, to calm himself. Pauses in which he tried to stop the disease from consuming him entirely, pauses in which he tried to free himself from its grasp if only to get the words stuck in his throat out before it would be too late.

„I love y—" 

Charles didn‘t care if this were to be the start of his end, didn‘t care if he were to die from it, he didn‘t care so long as he got to kiss Arthur before he did. 

Arthurs lips were chapped, and he was only barely responding, already starting to slip away gradually.

Charles was still holding onto Arthurs face, and he felt one of his own tears drip from his eye and onto his hand, flowing along his skin and onto Arthurs. He wiped it away quickly, somehow frantic, trying to keep Arthur with him for as long as he could. Deep within his soul, Charles knew, he knew that he couldn‘t; knew that Arthur wouldn‘t leave this mountain again.

And he felt Arthurs lips slump against his, and he felt his body going limp, his head dropping, now only being held up by Charles‘ hands and more tears started to drop onto Arthurs lifeless face. 

Despite the pain, the ache in his chest and the burning in his lungs, Charles stayed close and pressed his forehead against Arthurs‘. He knew it was for nothing, would lead nowhere at all, but he wanted to keep Arthur close.

„I love you too,“ he whispered into the dark, and nobody responded and nobody heard him as his words were carried away by the breeze and into the wide and open world. Somewhere, maybe in the still simmering fire in his chest, he felt that Arthur knew without hearing it. Knew it with every time Charles would glance at him, or craft arrows for him unpromptedly, or would ride with him without questioning their destination or their cause. He felt that Arthur knew by the way he would look at Charles, his eyes glowing in the sun as they crinkled from laughing. 

Charles stroked through Arthurs hair, a sob threatening to rip through his entire body before he willed it down, and he leaned down to kiss Arthurs forehead. One last time, he told himself.

Then, he sat down next to Arthur, next to all of the possibilities that had now ceased to exist. Next to the man whom he thought could change the world and next to the person that had made his heart beat only to be the reason for it to burn down. He looked to his left, over the body next to him, and watched the sunrise in serenity.

With the red and yellow light shining onto him, Arthur looked as though he was merely sleeping. The only thing that did not sit right within Charles‘ gut was the way Arthurs face had never been restless, even when sleeping, he was plagued by horror and death even in unconsciousness; but not now.

Now he was resting and finally at peace. Finally getting to leave the world that had promised him everything and then taken it away from him, the one that had robbed him of his kindness and made him fight to get it back. And, oh, how he fought and beat the world raw.

Charles lingered around for a while more, unable to bring himself to carry Arthur onto a good burying site; unable to let Arthur vanish into nothing but a rotting body underneath the ground. 

But, with a fire in his chest not unlike a wildfire spreading rapidly, burning in his chest with embers flying up and into his throat, Charles finally got up and lifted Arthurs body up and into his arms.

He tricked his mind into believing that Arthur was in a far better place now, that he was reunited back with Hosea, Lenny, Kieran and everybody else that they had to loose so soon.

And this fantasy would suffice, would be enough to keep Charles afloat until the day he would join them as well.

**Author's Note:**

> howdy partners am back to shatter your heart into pieces!!  
> (my tumblr is @oakenshied come cry with me there)


End file.
